~ ~ Randomized Thoughts ~ ~

Encounter

It’s the CSR Thursday. I returned an hour back with English books of primary classes in my bag. This is one of the few things I like about GIM. Every Thursday we have to work with a NGO and help them in the project which shall make a difference in the lives of unknown but needful. I want to give my best in this. Always wandering about ways to help the society, but failing to find it always, I find this to be an opportunity to create difference. Our group is to train the teachers of primary school in English. Teaching teachers – I felt the same irony as you all are feeling. But the ground realities are too bad here. Anyways that’s another story.

So what am I going to write about today..? Who knows..? You..? No...! Nor do I…Just felt the urge to write with nothing so specific to write about.  Attending classes, Washing clothes, listening to music, playing table tennis,  walking in campus, going for a movie, preparing for club selection – everything seem so randomised. I am directionless or was my life too directionful..? I wonder now. An ardent sleeping queen of min 10hrs a day has now become an insomniac staying awake all night long. Doing mistakes for which regret/tears is not the repent. I feel incomplete. The undone tasks mounting each minute I am loosing on health every day. This is a mad race. I can never be or I never want to be a part of this. Emotions, ethics, relationships have no place here. It is like now or never for everyone. ‘Living in the Moment’ says everyone. But is it always right to do so?  Is this true, or is this my perception? Always my mind run in two thoughts – Do this do that..? People do this but I want to do that.  Too many things pouring out. That’s the spur of the moment and music.

“I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream.
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean.
I don't know how I got this way
I know it's not alright.
So I'm breaking the habit,
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight!!!

On a lighter note:

“Hey baby! How r u..? I miss u…Wish you were here…”  “I had classes so couldn’t talk to u…” “Are I am telling no, I was busy with my assignment so couldn’t answer your call…” “I cannot talk to you always…”The overheard scenario of all committed singles here. Personal space, insecurity, possessiveness and what not..! What’s your take on “long distance relationship” – I questioned and then I smiled at myself. My research is on. I tend to observe a bit too much. Always that you find me smiling for no reason, or quietly taking the bench listening to opinions – It should be understood that I am onto something. Personally and seriously my true opinion says if the couple have something much more in common than just Love – relationship will work out no matter if its long distance or otherwise. It is open to debate and I know it shall lead to. Not many or rather hardly any share this opinion.

An update for dear ones:

Things were different a few days back. I became the JCC (Junior Core Committee) member of SOFIA after a rigorous selection process. SOFIA - The Society of Finance - one of the most prestigious clubs of GIM. Before going back home last month, presentations of various clubs were made by various clubs. Student Advisory committee (SAC), Mecca – for marketing, SOFIA – for finance, Razzmatazz – the cultural club, Kshitiz – the club, eerrrrrrrrrr. Altogether there are 15clubs and each club have about 6 SCC’s i.e Seniors core committee members and invitation was given for 6 JCC’s i.e Junior core committee members. From the batch of PGP – 1, 90 out of the batch strength of 240 get the opportunity to be a part of one of the clubs.

Once selected for a club, you are not eligible for any other club. Obvious reasons being, every club required lot of effort and time to organise respective events and to live up to the expectations. Managing one club responsibility with the management’s hectic schedule is itself a daunting task. So I had all reasons to smile. I again got to be a part of minority (hehe).I am a finance freak. I might sleep in any class but finance wakes me up. I waited all along and applied for JCC of only SOFIA. While many around starting trying their luck right since the first club. It doesn’t make sense to me. Clubs require dedication and passion and Finance is my passion. The only justification I gave to the question “why you should be taken as a SOFIA JCC” was “Passion”. Few decisions are backed by reasons and few others by passion. It has been proved time and again that latter serves best in the long run. The same is true when it comes to finance and me. I smiled when I made through it. SOFIA – JCC. Congratulations pouring in. But as they say success never lasts for long and failure never fades away quickly……………..

Lastly Goa looks mesmerizingly different in day and night. A ride along the roads of drizzling GOA in broad daylight has its own charm in comparison to the ride in the dark long bushy roads. When visit GOA do remember this.

At a standstill

I'll paint it on the walls

'Cause I'm the one that falls
I'll never fight again
And this is how it ends

So, I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit 
I’m breaking the habit 
Tonight!!!